In 2021 Satan’s School of Gay Communism Gift Shop donated $46,987 to organizations and individuals dedicated to creating a more diverse, inclusive, and equitable world.
This season, all shop profits will be donated to the National Network of Abortion Funds, ensuring abortion access through funding and advocacy.
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Wait a minute. Satan’s School of what now?
When an unhinged internet commentor called my alma mater a “Gay Communist College that Discriminants [sic] with Anti-White Racism” and suggested that “SATAN’S SCHOOL OF COMMUNISM should be their Motto” an alum aptly noted that actually, that would make a great t-shirt. So I made one. That was in March of 2021. Thousands of totes, mugs, tees, sweatshirts, and tank tops later, here we are.
The comment that started it all.
The first round of merchandise sales raised $15,000 for the Smith College student who continues to be affected by a 2018 incident of racial profiling and $26,825.39 for the Inclusive Smith Campaign, allocated to the Emergency Fund For Students of Color. An alum generously matched that donation dollar for dollar, raising the total donation to Smith to $53,650.78!
Every Smith College House On A…
A hat for every house at Smith College! A mug with all 41 residences boldly printed on colorful ceramic! From Albright to Cutter Ziskind and everywhere in between, stay caffeinated, stay hydrated, and arm yourself against the elements. And in case you’re wondering what the best house on campus is, it’s the one I lived in.
Two Tickets to Paradise (Pond)
Enjoy these greetings from the foggy memories of a time and place at Smith College. Did you ever row a boat out on Paradise Pond? Ponder your own mortality during a hungover brunch at Cutter Ziskind? Ride the PVTA to Hampshire Halloween? If you didn’t, you probably won’t want to buy these items. But if you did, I see you.
The Classics
The Winter of Our Discontent
We can't get a do-over on last year, but I did make you a bunch of stuff. I hope you project all of your hopes and dreams onto these things. Take them out. Spill sauce on them. Drag them through the winter and into brighter days. The glorious summer is coming soon. Just wait. I promise.
Friday Tea Collection
The tradition of Friday afternoon tea, where students mark the end of a busy week with snacks and tea, stretches back more than 100 years at Smith College. Featuring original art by Rose Metting, this limited-edition tote features Rose’s painting of the nostalgic Maytime china pattern once produced exclusively for Smith.
100% of profits from the sale of the Tea Time collection will be donated to GRuB, an organization located in Olympia that is especially meaningful to Rose. Since 1993, GRuB (Garden-Raised Bounty) has envisioned an equitable world nourished by healthy relationships, resilient community, and good food. Learn more and take a virtual tour of the GRuB farm here.
Mountain Day
A Smith College tradition since 1877, Mountain Day brings a surprise day off from classes and an invitation to explore New England in the fall. Announced by the ringing of the college bells, many students spend the day apple picking, boating on Paradise Pond, visiting the Book Mill, or taking very long naps.
Heady Nervy Intellectually Exciting
If you know you know. Was Carol Christ your president? Was the 2EAT Man one of your more meaningful college relationships? Was the Daily Jolt your favorite procrastination tool? Then you'll recognize this former unofficial Smith College slogan, resurrected by your local satanic gift shop.
More About The Shop
Who’s behind this thing?
Hi, I'm Drew Zandonella-Stannard. You happen to be on my website right now. I'm a writer and brand strategist who graduated from Smith College in 2006. When I first threw the shop together I thought I might sell ten shirts. As always, I underestimated the power of the Smith network for its absolute unwavering commitment to whatever it sets its mind to. When used for good, that is a very good thing.
Donation Recipients
Through June, all shop profits will be donated to the National Network of Abortion Funds, ensuring abortion access through funding and advocacy. Profits from the sale of Friday Tea merchandise will be donated to GRuB.
Previous beneficiaries include Care's Ukraine Crisis Fund, Marsha P. Johnson Institute (MPJI), International Rescue Committee (IRC), Culture AID NOLA, Texas Equal Access Fund (TEA Fund), the Smith College Emergency Fund For Students of Color.
Got an organization I should know about? Send me a message!
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